Spring Cleanse Rockstar Style

I have tried every type of doctor, specialist and healer. I have been pricked, poked, had hands laid on me and was finally filled with steroids for the itching in the back of my throat, the frequent colds and my chronic asthma, which all seem tied to some profound and constant allergic reaction I have had since childhood. I have had many periods of improvement, but never anything permanent. Until, I tried the Rockstar Cleanse.

My body rebels against my soul’s favorite things. Riding my horse, hiking, eating ice cream and cake, my supposedly hypoallergenic dog, the precious trees, covered with pretty green mold, that we are not allowed to touch in our overpriced, over controlled, slightly Stepfordish neighborhood all seem to leave me gasping for air and in a state of perpetual panic about where I put my little red inhaler.

When Dr. Ellen Cutler, renowned Bay Area asthma and allergy specialist and creator of the controversial Bioset treatment, told me I had to stop eating sugar to get my rid of my asthma I was horrified.

Sugar is my favorite food group.

When I noticed one of the members on the private social network for women I started ran a company called Your Rockstar Life a San Francisco based business that delivers raw foods for one week as part of a nutritional cleanse, I was tempted to turn to them to (hopefully) prove Dr. Cutler wrong about sugar and its inflammatory effects being the root of my problems.

According to Teresa Marchese, the founder of the Your Rockstar Life, though most do cleanses to get skinny, she designed her program to help women be well, body mind and spirit. Four days of raw food prepared and delivered, 1 day of juices only (all freshly prepared by Teresa as she sings to the food), 5 days of workouts and workshops to help the cleansers to shed emotional pounds as well, plus body and face oils, handmade detox teas and much much more. Sort of like a week at a destination spa but without having to take time off work.

She tells me this diet reduces inflammation in the body and can help my asthma. She says it also helps arthritis, fibromyalga and other such ailments.

How bad could freshly prepared meals delivered to my door, group outdoor exercises, and no coffee, sugar, meat or dairy be?

All I had to do was get at least 8 other women. I ended up with 12, almost all members of A Band of Wives, who seemed open and fun and more than a little nervous at our first raw dinner the Sunday before the cleanse officially started.

Teresa had given us a pre-cleanse diet, but mine consisted of downing all the wine and pork products I could at Robin Williams 60th birthday celebration the night before. I was even sucking on an iced decaf (coffee being my other favorite food) filed with cream when Teresa arrived that first evening. “Put that down!” Teresa yelled and rolled her eyes at me.

Teresa and her helper Sasha laughed and held out the trash. “The cleanse starts now!” they informed me in unison.

My large cleanse goodie bag contained: body scrub brush, bath salts that promise to make us sweat it out, detox body oil, face oil and cleanser. It also contained pills with catchy names like “chompers” and “flora.”

And then there was the clay and psyllium. “Not for your face” Teresa told me when I asked if it is for our faces.

“For what then?”

“To drink. It pulls out the toxins out of your intestines just like mud facials pull the toxins out of your face.”

You can check out the videos and see how we made our way through drinking dirt, losing weight, shedding emotional burdens, becoming asthma free and being very very hungry.

Cleanses like Blueprint, the Master Cleanse and the controversial HGC Diet restrict food way too much for my taste and they are also are a lonely road to a cleansed body. I had wanted to cut out dairy and processed foods, but I just couldn’t do it on my own. This program that includes a group of women to provide community and support and held me accountable through the cleanse was the only way I made it without sneaking handfuls of Cheddar Bunnies and buckets of Ben and Jerry’s.

Have you cleansed? Did it work for you?